Today when my maid delivered my daily copy of the New York Post, I was even more horrified than usual at the stories inside, namely one about how crop tops are the look of the summer season.
Um, no, darlings. Just no.
Firstly, these styles are not for apple-shaped girls, meaning those of you who carry your weight in your tummy. Only a pear shaped fashionista (who carries weight in her lower half) should attempt this look, and ONLY if she pairs it with a fluffy skirt–not a slinky one a la Katy Perry–to avoid looking like a sausage.
But it’s not just the bra-top styles I’m opposed to, minions. Diane Kruger’s more athletic style is equally unflattering, totally erasing any hint of breasts and making your torso look flat and wide.
Another thing to consider about this dubious garment is what you’re going to be doing when you wear it. Do you plan to sit, bend over or slouch at all? If so, get ready for some seriously unpleasant muffin topping.
The bottom line? Your shirt’s bottom line should hit below the belly button…or face a sartorial smackdown. What’s your take on this hard-to-wear style?