The Cannes Film Festival truly does draw all sorts of stars, from the flawless A-listers like Blake Lively and Leo DiCaprio to the other, less appealing celebs like Justin Bieber and Paris Hilton, who are very possibly hooking up (and thus kicking off the apocalypse). Lindsay Lohan is also in Cannes. Let’s try to guess which category she falls into!
LiLo has made the terrible decision (per usual) to document her trip to the glitzy film fest, and her pics are nothing short of pathetic. Let’s take a look and break down the Insta-tragedy, shall we?
Linds started off with a bang–or should I say bust?–in a topless selfie with some guy she
probably hooked up with knows.
“#isCANNESQuicheENUF ?!” she captioned the photo and OMFG LINDSAY STOP WITH THE “QUICHE” THING! No one thinks it’s cool or clever the 100th time you use it, so cut it out. And also, please put away your lady bits. If there’s one person left on Earth who hasn’t seen you half naked, I’m sure they’d like to keep it that way.
Next, she posted this pic:
“Scared of #paparazzos leaving yacht” she wrote. Who took this picture?? Is this a selfie? Ugh, so much more pathetic if it is. And Linds, the paps are like spiders–way more scared of you than you are of them.
And then this shot:
“Good morning early risers (ish) in #cannesfilmfestival” she titled this pic. Clearly she’s wearing the same dress she was the night before in the last snap, so unless she does 6am yoga in a sequined gown, she never went to bed. Gee I wonder how one could pull an all-nighter like that? I’m sure it was just pure Red Bull, n’est ce pas, darlings?
Overall, while I’d kill to be in Cannes ATM, I’m perfectly content to be wherever Lindsay Lohan is not. Do you think she needs to up her Instagram game or are you sickly addicted to her feed?